freewrite #2

My other goofy friend on trillian has selected the topic of "heartache".

This is a good topic. Thank god it's not "borneo cat population". Heartache is something I can write about. The thing that keeps coming to mind is a song called "good day" by the dresden dolls. It's really more about getting over heartache than anything, but I really like the way it deals with the subject. The dolls deal with a lot of subjects well. Good day says things like "I took out the trash today and I'm on fire." I like this line so much because I've been through some ugly breakups and it goes very slowly. Most days you go through the whole day sad, and when you don't have time scheduled, you sit in your room with your headphones on. Much like in one of the other Dolls songs. Anyways, I went through an ugly break up, and it was the little things that I did that were so triumphant. It wasn't getting on with my life and graduating and finding a new guy to love me--all of which eventually happened later--but waking up, getting out of bed, and actually working on homework or cooking some rice-a-roni that felt like major ummm... What's the word... Major.... Awesomeness. I'm trying to say that it's always the little stuff you can do for yourself that's important when you're heart is aching. Don't try to conquer the world.
These freewrites always turn out with an audience in mind. I always feel like I am writing to you the imaginary readers out there. Maybe one day I can try to work on my internal voice. My freewrites come out much better when they're private.