Friday, April 2, 2010

my "girlfriend"

Amanda Palmer posted on her blog about being in the studio again and a million other random things like she always does. I always like what she writes but then I saw this:

"i’ve forgotten exactly what it’s like to be sitting at the piano for the first time with a microphone shoved into your mind.
god it’s hard. your brain spins with pain and regret at every miniscule mistake and you want to destory your imperfect self with a sledgehammer."

YES!
Creativity, art expression, music, dance, jewelry, drawing: it's like having an amplifier on your brain and soul. It utterly infuriating if what you see or hear yourself do isn't an accurate reflection of you or if you see that you're not what you want to be... no matter how minuscule the difference between the ideal and reality is. In fact that's always infuriating and I always get out the emotional sledge hammer, and everyone doesn't know WTH to do with that... most people try to reassure me, but i know what i heard or saw or felt, so then the sledgehammer gets turned on them. Not good, but I always wish that just one person would get this. Amanda does.

It's why I love her and want to have her children.

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