what is vo0 doing now?

Q: What are you doing vo0?

A: I'm up at 2 am working on a project for a party, eating triscuits straight from the box and drinking milk with a questionable "goodness" level.

Q: Um... why?

A: I am up at 2 am working on a project because once I started working on it, I didn't feel like cursing, screaming and going back to bed, and this is one of the few times I haven't felt that way in the last few days.

Q: And why do I care about the triscuits and milk?

A: You don't, but this is a ridiculously interesting story. I ate so many kisses and candy cane kisses and peanut butter blossoms and pie pieces tonight that I have an aversion to sweets. Seriously, if I eat something sweet, it makes me make a lemon face. It's been about 3 hours since I had anything sweet at all and I just tried to eat a cinnamon muffin and threw it out after two excruciating bites.

This year's real santa letter

Santa,
I don't know how you did it, but you read my mind last year. I asked you for help walking my dog and getting my former students down for a nap, but what I really wanted was for mom to feel better, for my husband and I to have stable jobs and stable housing, and for my Dad to realize how important our silly shopping trip at the end of the year is. I got it all. Thank you.
Since you’re so good at fulfilling wishes, this year I expect that I will become a better chef than Emeril Lagasse, one day I will wake up and my house will be a gigantic castle filled with butterflies and purple glitter, My husband will write publish and article in JAMA on me being a medical miracle because I am so brilliant and creative, and in the morning, I will come downstairs and be greeted by a hippopotamus named ahboo with that tornado of fur we call a pet never to be found again.
Thanks in advance,
your favorite hippie princess,
Vo0


There was no reply this year due to this being printed out and since "santa" was staying here for Christmas and he came downstairs after I did.

i want to curse but i already cursed at my family enough...

.... so, i'll just sullenly say, "murry chrustmus"

prequel to the letter to santa, 2008

Last year, I couldn't come up with a good Santa letter, so I wrote one about what I was really feeling and it helped me get my thoughts straight enough to do a good letter to Santa. This year, I haven't been focused enough to come up with anything, so I'm going to do the same thing and see if it helps.

Santa,
I don't know how you did it, but you read my mind last year. I asked you for help walking my dog and getting my former students down for a nap, but what I really wanted was for mom to feel better, for my husband and I to have stable jobs and stable housing, and for my Dad to realize how important our silly shopping trip at the end of the year is. I got it all. Thank you.

This year what I want is to be able to do my job well. I want people to understand that I can't do a lot of things, but I'm willing to do anything I can to help you -- whoever you are. I would give almost anything not to make dumb mistakes that cause problems at work. Santa, I have to find a way to stay there-- It's where my heart is.

I also want to be better dog mommy. Most of the time, I just wish that annoying ball of fur would take care of himself or run away to magicdoggieland or something... but he doesn't deserve a mommy who thinks like that.

I want to be a better wife. I bitch about things that are unimportant and say nothing about the things that are. Sometimes, I like conflict for the sake of conflict. My husband doesn't deserve that.

I want SOMEONE to understand that there are some things I am not wired to do-- like error free data entry or remembering to turn of the ligths and lock the doors all the time every time.

I want to not feel like throwing things and hurting people during holiday meals and other gatherings. It seems like no matter what I do, and how I try to scale back, someone ends up getting yelled at. My family and friends don't deserve to be spoken to hurtfully and I don't deserve the stress that leads up to it.

I want to lose my 15 pounds back. Preferably without going back to weight watcher's. Just help me remember what I did then and maybe it will work again.

I also want to stop calling myself a fatso every time i look in the mirror. In fact, can I please just once see a beautiful person... not someone who is too fat or too skinny or who's hair is the wrong length... just plain ol me. In fact, I don't even have to be amazed, I just want to see the real me.... not a different me every day.

And santa, thank you for all the fun I've had this year. I have a unique and amazing job, a husband who's occasionally good at something, lots of good close friends who I don't have to hide from, great dance classes, lots of good food, and tons of amazing opportunities. Thank you.

Christmas with vo0

Turkey? nope
Leftovers? nope
dirty house despite hours of cleaning? check
Sick husband? check
Consuming mass quantities of sweets despite constantly berating myself for being overweight? check
Holiday Meltdown involving cursing at family members? Check
Understanding family who doesn't threaten to take away my presents despite that I don't deserve a bit of them? *sigh* check.